Need a quick pick-me-up? Laughter is the perfect cure for a stressful or mundane day. These 11 jokes will have you chuckling in no time, covering everything from bar buddies to quirky animals. Whether you’re into witty wordplay or offbeat humor, there’s something here for everyone.
1. Drink Down
A man walks into a bar and orders two shots every day. One day, the bartender finally asks, “Why do you always order two shots?”
The man replies, “One’s for me, and the other’s for my brother who lives far away. We used to drink together all the time.”
One day, the man orders just one shot. Concerned, the bartender asks, “Is your brother okay?”
The man smiles and says, “Oh, he’s fine. I just quit drinking.”
2. Penguin Parade
A truck driver gets pulled over by a cop, who hears strange noises from the trailer. When he checks, he finds 50 penguins.
“You can’t just have penguins in a truck!” says the cop. “Take them to the zoo!”
The next day, the same cop pulls him over again, and the penguins are still there—this time wearing sunglasses.
“I thought I told you to take them to the zoo!”
“I did,” says the driver. “They loved it. Now we’re going to the beach.”
3. The Plasterer Duck
A duck waddles into a bar, orders a beer and a sandwich, and shocks the bartender by talking.
Over the next two weeks, the duck becomes a regular. One day, the bartender tells a circus manager about the amazing talking duck.
Excited, the manager asks the duck to join his circus.
“The circus?” the duck asks. “With a big tent and animals in cages?”
“Yes!” says the manager.
The duck tilts his head. “Why would they need a plasterer?”
4. Slowpoke Centipede
A man buys a talking centipede for $100. He asks, “Want to go grab a beer?”
No response.
After trying a few more times, he finally hears, “I heard you! I’m putting my shoes on!”
5. Hell’s Handyman
An engineer mistakenly ends up in Hell. Seeing the place is a mess, he fixes the AC, fills the pool, and makes the roads better.
When God demands his return, the devil refuses.
God says, “Send him back, or I’ll sue!”
The devil laughs. “Where are you going to find a lawyer?”
6. The Big-Time Lawyer
Joe, a new lawyer, pretends to be on an important call when a man walks into his office. After an elaborate fake conversation, Joe asks, “How can I help you?”
The man replies, “I’m here to install your phone line.”
7. Chick Magnet
A city man moves to the country and starts farming. He buys 100 chicks, then 200 more the next week.
The store clerk asks, “How’s farming going?”
The man sighs, “Not great. I think I’m planting them too deep or too far apart.”
8. Bachelors
Two bachelors are chatting about cooking.
“I bought a cookbook, but I couldn’t make a single recipe,” says one.
“Why not?” asks the other.
“Every recipe started with, ‘Get a clean plate.’”
9. Copy That?
A new office worker struggles with a shredder. A coworker helps by shredding his report.
The man smiles, “Thanks! But where do the copies come out?”
10. Whoa, Amen!
A man borrows a religious man’s horse. “Say ‘Thank God’ to go, and ‘Amen’ to stop,” he’s told.
The man speeds up the horse but panics when he sees a cliff. Remembering the command, he shouts, “Amen!”
The horse stops just in time. Relieved, the man says, “Thank God.”
11. Nutty Natter
At a bar, a man hears voices complimenting him. Confused, he asks the bartender.
“It’s the peanuts,” says the bartender. “They’re complimentary.”
Ready for More Laughs?
Family life often provides endless comedic moments, from kids asking bizarre questions to parents’ quirky decisions. It’s messy, unpredictable, and always entertaining—perfect material for a good laugh.