In recent years, society has made significant strides in recognizing and talking openly about mental health. With the rise of awareness campaigns and open conversations, it’s becoming easier to recognize the signs of depression—not just in others, but also within ourselves. One surprising way to identify potential signs of depression is through the language someone uses. Experts have found that certain words and phrases are commonly repeated by people struggling with depression. While these expressions might seem harmless on the surface, they can be major red flags.

Recognizing Depression Through Language

Mental health is complex, and diagnosing or understanding it deeply requires extensive training and years of experience. Professionals in psychology and psychiatry spend countless hours studying human behavior, trauma, and how these factors affect the brain. But despite the complexity, doctors and therapists have shared some helpful insights—especially during Suicide Awareness and Suicide Prevention Months—to help people better recognize when someone may be silently suffering. One such insight is the common vocabulary depressed individuals often use.

Let’s look at seven phrases frequently used by people experiencing depression and explore what they could mean beneath the surface.

1. “Always” or “Never”

You might hear someone say things like, “I always mess things up,” or “Nothing ever goes right for me.” These are examples of absolutist language, often used by individuals who feel trapped in negative thought patterns. This kind of “black-and-white” thinking is draining not just for the person experiencing it but also for those around them. According to Dr. Deborah Serani, a psychologist and expert on depression, the brain’s frontal lobes are significantly impacted by the condition. As a result, reasoning and judgment become impaired, causing individuals to think in extremes.

Thankfully, as depression improves, so does a person’s ability to think more flexibly and reasonably. They begin to develop a broader range of thoughts and solutions rather than seeing everything in absolutes.

2. “I Can’t”

This simple phrase carries a heavy emotional weight when used by someone battling depression. “I can’t get up. I can’t focus. I can’t feel better.” For people dealing with mental health struggles, even basic tasks like brushing teeth or getting out of bed can feel impossible. Dr. Serani explains that when depression takes hold, it tends to shut down a person’s sense of possibility. They may feel completely powerless over their lives, reinforcing feelings of hopelessness and despair.

3. “It’s All My Fault”

Taking responsibility is usually a sign of emotional maturity, but when someone consistently blames themselves for things beyond their control, it could be a warning sign. People with depression often internalize blame, even in situations where they did nothing wrong. This stems from the same impairment in the brain’s reasoning centers. According to Dr. Serani, this pattern of guilt and self-blame can lead to dangerous thoughts, such as believing they’re a burden to others. It’s a mindset that can spiral into suicidal ideation—thoughts like, “Everyone would be better off without me.” This is why recognizing these verbal cues is so important.

4. “I’m Fine”

We’ve all said it before. But when someone says “I’m fine” with a forced smile or flat tone, it often means the exact opposite. Many people who are depressed feel ashamed to admit they’re struggling. The stigma around mental illness can cause them to mask their pain. They may pretend everything’s okay to avoid being judged, appearing weak, or making others uncomfortable. However, this avoidance can lead to even deeper isolation and a worsening of symptoms.

5. “I’m Tired”

Everyone feels tired now and then, but for someone with depression, this fatigue is chronic. It’s not just about being physically tired—it’s a deep, persistent exhaustion that sleep doesn’t fix. Dr. Serani notes that depression can lead to inflammation in the body, which impacts neural pathways and brain chemistry. This can cause not just fatigue, but also aches and pains that further lower a person’s energy and motivation.

6. “I Want to Be Alone”

Needing space from time to time is normal. But when someone consistently avoids social situations or isolates themselves for long periods, it might signal something more serious. People with depression often retreat into solitude, not because they prefer it, but because their brain is in survival mode. Dr. Serani explains that depression reduces overall brain activity, causing individuals to withdraw from stimulation and seek dark, quiet environments. Ironically, these are the very things that can make depression worse—what they really need is connection and support, even if they don’t feel up for it.

7. “No One Cares”

Hopelessness is a hallmark symptom of depression. When someone says “no one cares” or “what’s the point,” it often stems from deep emotional pain and a distorted sense of reality. Dr. Serani explains that the depressed brain creates tunnel vision, limiting a person’s ability to solve problems or see hope. They may become emotionally numb to others and simultaneously feel abandoned themselves. This mindset can make it incredibly difficult for them to reach out for help.

Finding Hope and Support

If you or someone you know is using these phrases regularly, it may be a sign of depression. The good news is there are many forms of help available. Treatment isn’t one-size-fits-all. It can include therapy, medication, support groups, lifestyle changes, and more. Exercise, proper sleep, nutrition, and mindfulness techniques can also play important roles in managing symptoms.

It’s also essential for loved ones to offer consistent support. People with depression often need more patience, empathy, and encouragement. Healthy relationships thrive on give-and-take. In hard times, leaning into community and connection can make all the difference—not just for the one who’s hurting, but for everyone involved.

Let’s continue to foster a culture that normalizes mental health conversations, listens without judgment, and encourages seeking help. Words matter—and sometimes, they’re the only clue someone gives that they’re not okay. Listening carefully could save a life.