Flirting isn’t always about flashy pickup lines or bold romantic gestures. In reality, the most powerful ways people show interest are often quiet, subtle, and body-based. A glance held just a little too long, a casual touch on the arm, or even a slight lean-in during conversation can speak volumes—if you know how to read the signs.

Understanding the difference between friendly gestures and flirty behavior can be a real game-changer, especially in today’s world where communication goes beyond words. Experts in body language and human behavior agree: the smallest physical cues often reveal the biggest feelings.

1. Physical Touch Says a Lot

If someone gently touches your arm, shoulder, or hand during a conversation, it’s not always innocent. Body language specialist Traci Brown says touch is one of the clearest ways someone shows they’re trying to connect. A quick tap could be nothing, but if that touch lingers longer than usual, there’s a good chance it’s intentional—and flirtatious.

2. The Smile That Doesn’t Fade

Not every smile means the same thing. According to licensed counselor Wale Okerayi, a genuine smile usually feels natural and warm—it lights up the person’s face and often comes with real interest. If someone smiles at you in a way that seems sincere and sticks around during conversation, it’s likely they’re enjoying your company. Fake, forced smiles tend to fade fast and don’t reach the eyes.

3. Eye Contact That Lasts

We’ve all heard the saying “the eyes are the windows to the soul,” and when it comes to flirting, eye contact is one of the clearest giveaways. When someone holds your gaze longer than what’s considered typical, Brown calls it “gazing lovingly”—a tell-tale sign they’re interested. On the flip side, if someone avoids your eyes altogether or keeps glancing away, they might not be feeling the connection.

4. Leaning In Signals Interest

If someone leans in while you’re speaking, it could be more than just a better way to hear you. It’s also a physical sign they’re engaged and emotionally present. Okerayi says leaning in is a subconscious way of showing attraction and closeness. It’s a green flag you don’t want to miss.

5. Scratching the Palm—A Quiet, Bold Signal

This one may sound odd, but in some African and Caribbean cultures, gently scratching someone’s palm during a handshake or touch isn’t random—it’s flirty. While it may not be widely understood in Western culture, it’s often used as a subtle way of expressing romantic interest, teasing playfully, or even showing emotional connection. That said, sometimes a scratch really is just a scratch—context matters.

6. Relaxed Body Language Equals Comfort

When someone feels at ease around you, it shows. Open body language—like uncrossed arms, loose posture, and relaxed facial expressions—are all signs they feel comfortable, and possibly even attracted to you. Brown points out that people who are tense or closed off might not feel the same connection, and their stiff gestures can be a clear signal to take a step back.

7. Proximity Says More Than You Think

When someone chooses to sit or stand closer than necessary, that’s a big clue. Brown explains that people tend to physically move toward things—and people—they’re drawn to. If someone is continually closing the gap between you two, they might be trying to send a clear (albeit quiet) message. Just remember that personal space preferences vary, so read the situation carefully.

8. Lip Biting and Flirty Glances

Ever seen someone bite their lip while looking at you or tilt their head with a half-smile? These little gestures can be loaded with meaning. They’re often associated with flirtation, attraction, or even nervous energy. Still, don’t rely on just one signal—look at their overall behavior, tone of voice, and the emotional vibe they’re giving off.