Truly understanding someone doesn’t always take years. Sometimes, if you know what to look for, you can uncover their true nature within minutes. It’s not about appearances, social status, or even the words they use to describe themselves. Instead, the most reliable clues are found in subtle behaviors—those small, instinctive reactions that people often don’t realize they’re showing.

Carl Jung, the Swiss psychiatrist who founded analytical psychology, believed that a person’s real character comes through in everyday, unguarded moments. According to him, if you want to see who someone truly is, there are two key behaviors worth paying close attention to. His insight may be simple, but it gives us a deeper way of seeing people for who they really are.

Two Behaviors That Reveal True Character

Jung didn’t believe that character showed itself in big speeches or carefully crafted images. Instead, he argued that someone’s essence comes out in the small things—moments when there’s no reward to be gained and no audience to impress. The two behaviors he pointed out are especially telling:

1. How a person treats those who can do nothing for them
One of the clearest windows into someone’s soul is watching how they interact with people who hold no power—like waiters, cashiers, janitors, or even strangers passing by. Do they show kindness, patience, and respect? Or are they dismissive, rude, or condescending? When someone consistently treats others with dignity, even when there’s nothing in it for them, it reflects empathy, humility, and integrity. On the flip side, arrogance and cruelty toward those who can’t offer anything back often point to a shallow moral core.

2. How a person reacts to frustration
Life rarely goes smoothly, and it’s in those difficult moments that true character surfaces. When faced with delays, mistakes, or setbacks, does a person lash out, blame others, or lose their temper? Or do they stay calm, take responsibility, and push forward with resilience? Jung believed that character isn’t tested in times of comfort but in times of crisis. The way someone handles frustration reveals their emotional maturity, self-control, and ability to adapt.

Other Subtle Signs That Speak Volumes

While these two behaviors form the heart of Jung’s insight, there are other small but meaningful ways to understand people more deeply:

• Sense of humor: Humor often reveals what’s happening under the surface. Someone who makes lighthearted, inclusive jokes may be compassionate, while a person who leans on cruel or cutting humor may be masking insecurity or bitterness.

• How they talk about others: Constant gossip or negativity often signals inner dissatisfaction, whereas people who highlight others’ strengths tend to be more grounded and content.

• Listening skills: Genuine listening—without interrupting, dominating, or dismissing—shows respect and emotional awareness. People who truly pay attention often value connection over control.

• Use of power: Few situations reveal character more clearly than moments when someone holds influence over others. Do they use that power to uplift, protect, and inspire, or do they exploit it for personal gain?

Why These Clues Matter

The beauty of Jung’s perspective is that it shifts our focus away from appearances and carefully polished images. We live in a world where people can curate their lives on social media, highlight their best moments, and control what others see. But character isn’t about staged photos or public declarations. It’s about what people do when no one’s watching, when there’s nothing to gain, and when life throws challenges their way.

By paying attention to these subtle behaviors, we can learn more about someone’s true self without needing years of history with them. It’s not about judging harshly, but about observing thoughtfully. These small insights help us choose who we trust, who we admire, and who we allow into our lives.

Carl Jung’s timeless lesson reminds us that character is less about what people say or show, and more about what they quietly do. The truth is always there, waiting in the little moments—if we’re willing to notice.